Clown

In Akron, Ohio, a 70-year old woman named Jacqueline Cutright was robbed while pooping.  That's right ladies and gentlemen, pooping.  She was not sitting upon a public throne where any stranger could have taken advantage of our most vulnerable moment.  Nay, she was upon her own throne, within her own home.

It gets better.  Because as Jacqueline sat, minding her own business, a man wearing a clown mask bursts in the door!  Apparently he was demanding to know where all the drugs and money were.

The confused woman started laughing, saying, "Boy, did you break into the wrong house?"

Fuhreal guys, this clown-faced bandit broke into the wrong house, scrambled around, stole $28, some jewellery, and the woman's vehicle.  When trying to make his speedy getaway, he rolled the vehicle before even getting to the end of the street, was stopped by police, and just stood and confessed his story.

Some days, I really love humanity.

Good thing he made a run for it, she was about to do NINJA STUFF to him!

Satanic?

One of the less-commonly followed branches of the Abrahamic religions is the oh-so-famous Satanism.  Of the actual faith, there are many different branches and ideologies, sometimes involving the Judeo-Christian "Satan", other times completely independent of the notion.

Regardless, to many Americans, the term invokes in thought the idea of a group of cliché comic book-esque villains worshipping the forces of evil.  While in reality this is not always the case, the image remains engrained.  Because of this, it seems that many police officers have come to believe that certain types of homicides must correlate with being the cliché evil-worshipping villain.  And in an attempt to teach their fellow officers of these dastardly methods through VHS, we end up with hilarious videos like this one:







This is in no way to trivialize anyone's religious beliefs and certainly not the act of homicide, but only to point out that people can be remarkably silly at times.

Kesha

Deep in the mountains of China, is the small village of Kesha.  It's nestled in the gorgeous scenery of the Hunan province, south of the Yangtze River and Lake Dongting.

It was once a centre for migration, and during the Five Dynasties and Ten Kingdoms period, it was home to the Ma Chu independent regime.  The economy is almost entirely dependant on the production of rice.  However, the region is known for having remarkably skilled artists and craftsmen.  Countless Keshans have created embroidered silks, carved jade, and works worthy of international acclaim.  The cuisine is famed for their use of chilli peppers.

 

Photo Courtesy of Gjl at en.wikipedia.org

Gravity

We've all witnessed the mystical event of a house cat drinking water.  How he drops his tongue into the bowl, and carefully balances the droplets in a crevice so that it can be effectively be lapped up.  Some of us, namely myself, have even gone so far as to attempt this artful way of drinking, with varying degrees of success.

Well, here comes SCIENCE!  Ready to blow everything you knew about anything out of the water yet again!  A team of researchers from Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Virginia Tech and Princeton University have put extensive study into the drinking mechanism of a cat.  And they have discovered that instead of scooping up water, the tongue of a cat creates a kind of gravitational inertia.

MIT's Roman Stocker and colleagues wrote, "Casual observation hardly captures the elegance and complexity of this act, as the tongue's motion is too fast to be resolved by the naked eye".  The water is drawn up through inertia in a column, which is used to get it neatly into the cat's mouth before gravity pulls it back down.  So far, this gravity defying act is only known in cats.